What would an VIIIs rehearsal be without getting dangerously off-task by saying irrelevant, silly things? On this page, we’ll share with you just some of the great utterances of the past several semesters. Eights names are used to protect the innocent.
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Quotes
Spring 2009
While in Felix’s room making VIIIs meeting cards, Giddile tells Felix and Viva about how his karate class was canceled that day.
Giddile: I was so bummed out that I treated myself to an ice cream sundae and then a brownie sundae, and then I thought, “I need more ice cream in my life,” so I bought some ice cream for my fridge.
Viva: Can I rub it with my tongue?
Apu: That’s what she said.
Viva: Wait, no, I don’t get it! I want to touch your soft thing!
Apu: Yeah, that’s… really what she said.
Vanibeat: Oh, did you get it in that last time, too?
Felix: That’s what she said.
Felix: Whoa! Can you make it stand up again?
Giddile: That’s what she said.
Giddile: I’m screwing it in! Are you screwing it in?
Apu: I’m definitely screwing!
Panglora: There are two men screwing in the corner!
Felix: Why are all the best quotes the ones without any words?
Viva: I was trying to get the cutoffs for “heart” and “blart” and “bloop” and “blah…”
Sgt. Khameldust: A Travis on time is a Travis that’s… fiiiiiine!
Apu: We were going to sing a song, but now we’re talking about verandas made out of flesh!
Tstringi: I can has cheer?
D’Porsie: No! You cannot HAS anything!!
Viva: Be sure to cut off your “wah”s.
Apu: If only I had the blood of a virgin princess. Then I would no longer be thirsty.
Vanibeat: I quit World of Warcraft.
Hobbeau: THANK YOU!
Apu: You smell like cigarettes.
Sherpo: You hang out with me anyway.
Apu: Yeah, and then I take a shower afterwards.
Panglora: And the worst part was that I found an eyelash this morning and I wished for it to be a good day!
D’Porsie: I’m sure it was a good day for someone.
Panglora: You are the angel of doom!
Viva: It’s 11:56.
Apu: Do you know where your children are?
Clandy: Dead.
Sherpo: Our concert is going to be so effing quiet and so effing intense! People are going to be on the edges of their seats like, “OH MY GOD, THEY’RE GOING TO SING ANOTHER SONG!”
Fall 2008
Viva: ParticipVIII! I’m so clever!
Viva: I was a girl scout for a day… and then I ate all the pizza that we made and the lady asked me not to come back.
Vanibeat: Are you Mary Poppins? Are you going to pull out a couch?
Felix: Mary Poppins didn’t die in the movie!
Viva: She should have.
Sgt. Khameldust’s dream-cheer: I dreamt I had a popsicle and it was really great! And then I had an VIIIsicle and I’m in Henry’s VIII!
Vanibeat: I’m really excited about Disco Dodge! I have a pimp suit. It was my grandpa’s. I really want to get it dry-cleaned.
Tstringi: Every time you screw around, Nik swears at an Irishman.
Giddile: Your mom is so fat she died from a quadruple bypass…?
Sgt. Khameldust: Google birth is next.
Chetink: Wait, let me write it down, for pros-… for pos-… for…
Giddile: For prosperity’s sake?
Chetink: Paparazzi?
Felix: Prostitution?
Vanibeat: Split personalities?
Are you ready to sing until you don’t know it anymore?
Felix (Parodying “Goodbye Earl”): Maryanne and Wanda were lesbians, all through their high school days… both members of the 4H club, both active in the GSA!
D’Porsie (Distracted): I’m sorry, I was thinking of Spanish words.”
Chetink and Felix (Parodying “Hallelujah”): She beat you with a folding chair, she slashed your throat and she killed your puppy, that crazy bitch was singing Hallelujah!
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